Where to begin. It has been 4 years since we graced the internet with our presence, so it's probably best we start off by filling you in on what we've been up to in that time. Towards the end of 2004 we were indicted at The Hague Tribunal on a litany of charges including inciting riots, overdue books, trafficking underage football talent, and impersonating FIFA officials. We had Blatter's high priced attorneys after us and they were looking for punishment to the fullest extent of the law.

Needless to say we were forced to flee. Our website, mtbftr.com (look it up in the waybackmachine if you were living under a rock during the early 2000's) was shut down. In addition to Interpol, Nick Sakiewicz's private investigators were hot on our trail as well, and the law was finally catching up to us. Our only hope was to put our lives in the hands of an old friend, a Nigerian bootlegger that specialized in golf clubs and potato peelers, and were given refuge in an undisclosed cave somewhere on the planet Earth. Luckily there was internet access, so we were able to keep up with all the news surrounding the MetroStars. Like the opening of their new stadium in Harrison and that first MLS championship. [/sarcasm] Apparently not much changed in our absence.

Except of course that name and logo shit.

After a few years on the run, moving from country to country conspicuously posing as Latin American soap opera stars, we were contacted by makers of Mad Dog 20/20 because they liked our style and wanted to be associated with our "brand". Short on money and desperate for a renewed presence on the web, we held a secret meeting with them in the fall of 2007. They came with suitcases full of cash and a great business plan which centered around dumping the MTBFTR moniker and rebranding to MD2020.com. For the relaunch of the site they would bring in a team of alcoholic daredevils, street mimes and a blockbuster performance by Vanilla Ice. In exchange, we would have to rename ourselves MadDog1 and MadDog2, and promote Mad Dog 20/20 at every chance we got. For example, when we sent out death threats we would have to preface them by saying, "The following death threat is brought to you by... Mad Dog 20/20! Get fucked up tonight with The Dog!"

We were running out of alternatives, our cash was low, the authorities were closing in, and New England almost won an MLS Cup.

Could we do it? Drop MTBFTR? The site that was synonymous with the MetroStars (...failures)? The site that helped make Steve Jolley the internet's first superstar blogger? The site that brought to light the obesity problems of Columbus? The site that was integral in creating an underground railroad for Colombian soccer players to come to the tri-state area?

After much thought we decided to tell those Mad Dog 20/20 assholes to shove it. We're MTBFTR for fuck's sake! You would have to be a real sell out douche bag (or a tranny) to switch your whole identity from one day to the next. Instead we decided to just try and sell more copies of this book to get some cash together to fund a new site.

So here we are, a new MLS season, number 13 if you're even still watching. We'll be mixing in a lot of new content with some oldies but goodies. As always, we welcome you to take your opinions and suggestions and stick them where the sun don't shine. We hereby place everyone on notice. We are back, we are watching closely, we will take you out to the shed and beat you.

Sincerely,
Mr. Red and Mr. Black